Dear Hildegarde: Your Questions Answered

Dear Ms. Hildegarde,

I agree with your recent post [Charm: How Much is that Doggie in the Window?] regarding the impropriety of discussing finances. How would you suggest I respond to such a rude inquiry?

Signed,
anonymous

Dear anonymous,

Thank you for your post. It is amazing how so many people find it acceptable to be so intrusive into others' lives. I am pleased to see that you are already on your way to being full of grace and poise as you seek to better yourself in your dealings with others.

As I mentioned in my post, the best you can do is to try to redirect the conversation onto another topic. Housework is always a favorite, especially among women. If you are speaking with men (although this would be most inappropriate unless your husband is present), a good discussion on the sporting crowd usually does the trick.

However, some of those people are so persistent, at times, you may be brought to a point of discomfort. The worst way to handle this situation is to be rude back to Mr. or Mrs. Nosy by saying something like, "that is none of your business". That would all but completely damage all of your hard work toward your goal of loveliness and charm. You also do not want to show a lack of respect for the other person, especially if he or she is older than you. I feel the best response is to do what we ladies do best--play "dumb". Just respond by saying, "I am not quite sure about that" or just spontaneously create some ridiculous answer. Perhaps you will look foolish, but your financial secrets and your charm will remain intact!

Until next time...

HF