Etiquette: Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend, but Not Before 6:00 pm...

Dear Reader,

I have recently been the recipient of numerous questions regarding jewelry; therefore, I will dedicate to-day's lesson to the discussion of diamond watches. What are the rules? Read on...

A diamond watch is simply not practical for the following two reasons:

1. Persons of status never wear a watch after 6:00 pm. If one is a person of social standing in the community and of stature, why need she bother about the time? The evening is hers and she has no place to be in the morning, short of her yacht or a Junior League committee meeting, which would never begin before morning cocktails anyway.

2. Diamonds are not to be worn by persons of class BEFORE 6:00 pm (other than an engagement ring). Does the reader see the dilemma here?

Do yourself a favor...forego the diamond watch and get yourself a stainless Rolex. Problem solved.

Until next time...

HF

Charm: He Who Has an Ear, Let Him Hear!

Dear Reader,

I just love it when I can come home from some event and have something simply scandalous about which to write. It just makes my day and it is all the more knowledge for you! On to our lesson...

My very polite, gentlemanly, and confederate husband and I returned home a while ago from morning church services. During the service, I was shocked to see an otherwise charming and poised lady cleaning her ear right in front of me with the arm of her reading glasses! I would have fallen out of my chair agasp if it weren't for my strong suitor sitting next to me. Because of my normally poised nature, of course, I was quickly able to regain my composure, but know dear reader, I was making a mental note of the occurrence just for you.

Here is our lesson for today: no public grooming. If you have an unfortunate itch somewhere on your person, please excuse yourself from public view to remedy the situation. No one wants to see someone with her keys in her ear, scratching her person, etc. Unfortunately today, ladies no longer wear gloves, so one is forced to shake hands against bare skin. Would you want to shake hands with someone who just had her hands in her hair, her ears, or any other place for that matter? I certainly would not want to pick up that lady's reading glasses, the ocular assistors now having explored the depths of her "eerie" canal!

Ladies, I am afraid that this is a topic which will need to be reviewed from time to time. However, in the meantime, think about how you would feel if you saw some of these public grooming actions. Would you ever want someone else to be thinking those things about you? Keep those hands at bay--in your lap, folded daintily.

Until next time...

HF

Charm: Rosie and "The Donald"

Dear Reader,

As you know, I try to avoid judging specific (i.e., named) people in my posts, but rather discuss the sordid behavior of those around me in an anonymous way, as anything else just wouldn't be proper. However, to-day, I see no reason why I should not address this very public and unfortunate feud going on in the media. Many of you might be confused as to what is happening in pop culture to-day--no wonder--there is nothing "cultural" about it.

Now, onto our lesson. There is a great point to be made here and a good lesson for everyone: money and class do not necessarily sport a direct relationship. Look how obnoxiously both Ms. O'Donnell and Mr. Trump have been behaving: calling each other negative names, making moral judgments upon one another--and the worst of it--all within view of the public eye. I guess that their mothers never instructed them properly regarding the airing of one's dirty laundry. Regardless, note that both of these persons have full bank accounts and probably many investments; however, there is not one shred of class to be found between the two of them. No proper lady or gentleman of breeding would ever behave in such a ludicrous manner. Breeding is simply that. Regardless of one's bank account, one simply cannot make a silk purse out of a sow's ear, short of following my advice, of course.

So, my advice to you, dear reader, is to take heart. Do not be discouraged if you do not make a good living or if you have no inheritance before you. If it is your desire to be a beautifully poised and charming lady, fear not, simply follow the advice in my posts and you will find yourself transformed. For those who have had the benefit of trust accounts but have been affected by recent poor investments, take heart as well. Class remains--a lady is a lady regardless of the size of her purse. But, do seek some more reliable financial counsel in the future, dear.

Until next time...

HF

Beauty: Estee Lauder Passes the Test

Dear Reader,

It has been quite some time since I have posted in the "beauty" category, so I thought I would revisit it at this time. I have seen so many more breaches of etiquette and charm recently that I haven't had the time to address some fundamental beauty issues. Take heart, dear reader--I will not let you down in this area. Read on...

As some of you know, I consider myself a slave to my beauty regimen, although not necessarily to a specific line of products. I like to try different beauty creams and the like, in an effort to always keep you current on my findings. Well, to-day I must firmly compliment the Estee Lauder line of products for their keen innovation and sensible mainstay of products that truly work to promote loveliness, beauty, and charm. All ladies of charm should take a regular beauty cream, but now there are so many other products on the market to enhance one's loveliness--it would really be a shame to overlook them:

Estee Lauder Perfectly Clean Cleanser
Estee Lauder Idealist Skin Refining Treatment
Estee Lauder Idealist Eye Serum
Estee Lauder Day Wear Anti-oxidant Beauty Cream
Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Concentrate
Estee Lauder Re-Nutriv Cream
Estee Lauder Idealist Micro D Skin Refinisher

All of these products work fascinatingly well together. Head over to your local beauty counter to-day and collect some samples. If there were some better beauty products available for your loveliness program, wouldn't you want to try them? Gather an arsenal of products and treatments which work for you and use them regularly. The benefits of your increasing beauty will surely outweigh the time it takes for your program.

Until next time...

HF

www.esteelauder.com

Dear Hildegarde: Your Questions Answered

Dear Mrs. Fillmore,

I have a few coworkers who are having babies in the Spring. I told my wife that "so and so" from the office was pregnant and she quickly rebuked me, telling me that I was using a vulgar word and that I should say, "expecting". I never thought that "pregnant" was a bad word. What is she talking about?

Sincerely,

Pregnant with Anticipation

Dear Mr. Anticipation,

Thank you so very much for your post. It is lovely to have male readers come to me for advice. So many men today try to fare on their own innate knowledge. It is nice to hear from you to-day. What is needed here is a lady's touch...

Now, to the question at hand. Just as a measurable difference exists between a "woman" and a "lady" (and may I say that any female who does not know the difference between the two would fall into the "woman" category), the same is present between the words "pregnant" and "expecting" (or "with child", "in a family way", "going to have a baby", etc.). The word "pregnant" in and of itself is not vulgar or bad, but it has its time and place, like the doctor's office. It should not be used in mixed company or around children. It just sounds common and too clinical, more like a feared diagnosis than a celebration of the birth of a child. There are many more polite alternatives to share the good news.

Now, it is important that you practice the usage of your new vocabulary. To say to your wife that someone is "expecting", for example, will seem awkward and uncomfortable at first, just because you are not used to it, but after a time, it will be music to your wife's ears. Just as it is uncomfortable for a factory worker to don a suit and tie for special occasions, over time, he becomes more comfortable in it, especially if the people with whom he surrounds himself are doing the same. If you are a lady of charm and poise (or one who is studying along this path--good for you!) who wants to class climb, follow the same rule.

Hildegarde's further advice on "class climbing": Associate with those with whom you would like to be associated. Sometimes it takes work, but you can get there if you are diligent in following my advice on beauty, etiquette, and charm. Take heart lady readers--the higher the climb, the larger the ring!

Happy New Year to all!

Until next time...

HF

Do you have a question for Mrs. Fillmore? Please send an email to hildegardefillmore@hotmail.com.